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Buzzfeed news: I attended submissive school for a night. here's what I learned.

3/17/2023

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“Within the kink community, they hear that submissives are strong and that they are really the ones who hold the power in a power exchange relationship. Meanwhile, the general community tends to view submissive personalities as fragile, weak, or broken in some way. … This push-pull of being on a pedestal in one space and misunderstood in another can be really difficult for submissive folks,” she said. “The best people to understand what it means to move through the world as a submissive … is another submissive.” 

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Consent Dojo: BDSm, Judaism, and Sex Therapy

3/17/2023

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The natasha helfer podcast

3/1/2023

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mashable: what is piss play, the fetish in the new season of 'you'

2/10/2023

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"Degradation play is an activity that involves creating a consensual, pre-negotiated feeling of humiliation, worthlessness, shame, or embarrassment in someone... While masochism is often thought of as someone enjoying physical pain — and that's true for many — some masochists instead enjoy the way their bodies respond to these intense emotional sensations."

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Journal of Sex & marital therapy: review of rethinking sex: a provocation

1/12/2023

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"Pain, in Emba’s framework, is harm, and Herbenick’s data is used to gird Emba’s claim that all bad sex is inherently harmful (if not via physical pain, then emotionally or spiritually). Her solution takes the form of restricting their sexual choices and agency, rather than addressing the physiological origins of the pain she describes or encouraging greater self-awareness and improved intimate negotiations skills. Because she takes the position that “some things should just be off limits” rather than advocating for increased agency and empowerment of women; her conclusions feel short-sighted and agenda-driven, rather than genuinely interested in understanding the causes of and remedies for sexual pain. For this woman reader, Emba’s view of women as passive victims of men, of capitalism, and of their own foolish choices felt degrading."

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The imposter syndrome podcast

1/3/2023

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In this unconventional episode, Stefani shares with us what she talks at tech conferences and what is the number one thing that we techies can learn for better social interactions.
She will explain how unspoken expectations harm our professional relationships and the need to be aware of our surroundings in order to better interpret social boundaries.
We will explore the importance and difficulties of communication, and how to exercise empathy to understand how the people around us experience the world and create a fuller and better relationship with our peers.

Listen to the full episode here
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Business INsider: If you get a little aroused when someone compliments you, you might have a praise kink

12/17/2022

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"When we receive praise from anyone, it activates the ventral striatum, one of the reward centers of the brain. The striatum then releases dopamine, which triggers a physiological response in the brain very similar to an orgasm, and leaves us feeling happy and self-satisfied,"

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Channel q's The morning beat with AJ & Mikalah: Is lesbian bed death real?

12/9/2022

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Stefani joined the Channel Q morning show to discuss myths and realities around WLW sexuality. 
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Sex & Psychology: The Leather couch, bdsm, kink & sex therapy

10/25/2022

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Imagine you are a sex therapist and one of your patients discloses a sexual interest that either makes you personally uncomfortable or is something you are totally unfamiliar with. This often happens when kinky people seek out sex therapy, and it sometimes results in clients not getting the help they really need. So let’s talk about navigating sex therapy with kinky clients. We’re going to discuss what therapists need to know, as well as how patients can identify kink-affirming providers.
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Sex & Psychology: Demystifying BDSM & Kink

10/18/2022

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Most of us have had a kinky fantasy at some point in our lives, and many of us have actual experience with kink in the bedroom as well. In fact, nationally representative US surveys find that at least one-third of adults have engaged in some kind of BDSM. However, despite how common kink and BDSM are, myths and misconceptions abound. So let’s talk about kink!
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Copyright © 2015
Photo used under Creative Commons from Яick Harris
  • Stefani
    • My Philosophy
    • My Writing
    • Consulting & Supervision
    • Conferences & Presentations
    • The Securing Sexuality Podcast
  • Services
    • Better Sex Strategies
    • Individual Counseling
    • Couples & Partners Counseling
    • Premarital Counseling
    • Transitions/Divorce
  • Specialties
    • Gender Affirming Care
    • Kink Affirming Practice
    • Alternative Relationships
    • Faith Affirming Sex Therapy
  • In the News
  • FAQ
  • The Securing Sexuality Podcast
  • The Foundation
  • Resources
  • Contact
  • Bookshop